Hello lovelies,
In 2020, I was very lucky to have become pregnant in my first egg donation attempt and to have a wonderful daughter. However, the journey to having a sibling has been difficult and has now dragged on for 2.5 years, with four transfers without implantation and a lot of waiting time. Now we want to start one last attempt at another clinic, with a guarantee of two blastos, and if these attempts number 5 and 6 (and possibly 7, if more blastos come along) also turn out negative, then it's over for us. Firstly, for financial reasons - we will have spent over 25,000 euros "for nothing" - and secondly, because hope is fading, I'm starting to get fed up with the whole thing, the doctors' appointments, the organization, the medication, the research, the sometimes bumpy communication with clinics abroad, the dashed hopes, etc., and because I finally want to look to the future again. We also recently introduced a plan B, more on that below.
I know that compared to those of you who are still fighting for your first child, I have a lot to say, after all, I am already a mother. But even then there are options for a plan B - be it adoption, taking in a foster child, godchildren, career opportunities, volunteering, hobbies or, or, or... But I have the feeling that these thoughts about quitting are a taboo subject in most fertility forums. You always get the kind encouragement not to give up yet, to try again, at some point it will work for you too, after all it worked for xy too...
Perhaps there is someone in this large community who would like to talk about quitting and possibilities for a plan B?
Our plan B at the moment is to foster a child. We've now had the second of six appointments for the preparatory seminar at the youth welfare office, and four other couples who want to have children are attending the seminar with us. We haven't decided yet whether we will really take the plunge and have a foster child, whether it might work out again with egg donation or whether we will remain one-child parents after all. Perhaps someone is thinking along similar lines and would be interested in sharing their thoughts.
Kind regards,
Nini
